The waiting game

I can’t control the timing. I can control what I do next.

Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

This space had been reserved for a different topic. A totally different dispatch.

But that dispatch has been delayed.

And I’m at peace with it.

God’s got a blessing with my name on it. When it arrives, I’ll rejoice. Until then, I’m reminding myself that a delay is just that — a delay.

It might cost me a few more dollars. It might bring a few more sleepless nights. But this too shall pass. And the blessing doesn’t come with an expected date.

That last part has been hand-crafted for me.

I’m learning to let go. To stop trying to control every aspect of my life. It’s a challenge. A big one. But it’s one I need to face, because I know I’ll be better equipped for whatever comes next if I learn how to sit with uncertainty instead of constantly trying to solve it.

So I’m stuck in the same storm for a little while longer.

That gives me an opportunity to keep building. Keep stacking good habits. Keep growing my discipline, attitude and behavior.

I told you about eliminating dining out in August. It was one of the ways I chose to start dealing with an expensive year — controlling what I could during a season when there’s plenty I can’t.

Sometimes that means reverting to the basics.

Nothing wrong with that. Nothing I haven’t done before.

But you can only cut back so much. Increasing your income is always the more efficient route when solving money problems. I’m still working on that, too.

Until that happens, I’m making some choices about where my money needs to go — and where it doesn’t.

Here are five categories where I’ve saved hundreds of dollars recently by pulling back:

Dining out: In the four months before August, food and drink ranked among the top three categories on my credit card statement every month. In August, it fell to seventh, just behind a $229 annual membership listed in the fees and adjustments category. Cutting back here can easily save me $500 or more in a month.

Dating: If I’m not taking myself out to eat, I probably shouldn’t be paying for someone else’s meals or experiences. Dating is still a way for me to get out of the house and experience life, but it’s a slippery slope financially — and emotionally. I’ve had to be more mindful about how much I’m spending on showing someone else a good time. There’s a difference between being generous and pretending you’re in a financial season that you’re not. I’m learning to recognize it.

Shopping: I’m not a big shopper, but I’ve had to rethink everything from clothes to small conveniences and creature comforts. Only essentials are making it from my online cart to an actual order. A blanket, kitchen towels, a travel backpack and a back-to-school gift basket for Parker have made the cut recently. Otherwise, the Amazon boxes have slowed considerably.

Entertainment: Snoop Dogg performed on a Friday night I had free, and a coworker had two tickets for sale. I thought about buying them and taking a plus one. I didn’t. It wouldn’t have been wise. It’s not a good time — and, truthfully, I’m not dying to see Snoop Dogg. In good times, I would have claimed the tickets just for the experience.

Home upgrades: This one hurts the most. There are plenty of things we want — and need — to do in our new home: install a dishwasher, paint the walls, decorate and tackle projects. They’ve all had to wait. It’s not how a new homeowner imagines experiencing a new home, but it’s also a reminder of why financial gurus warn against being “house rich and cash poor.” I didn’t plan on being here. But here I am.

Waiting.

Building.

And patiently preparing for the blessing God has with my name on it.