The untold weight of weight loss

I’m changing for the better, and it’s become noticeable.

Photo by Samuel Ramos on Unsplash

Many want to lose weight.

Few probably consider the unwanted attention that accompanies the achievement.

Family, friends and co-workers have commented on my appearance over the past year. They started in earnest last summer. Through fall and winter, compliments started flowing my way.

There was the first Saturday in February, when the Chicago Bulls’ head coach, Billy Donovan, made note of my weight seconds before his pre-game interview with a room full of reporters. His muted volume mixed with his thick New York twang to make the moment worse. I couldn’t hear him, forcing him to repeat his query three times from the front of the room.

“You losing some weight?” he asked, just before delivering his team’s injury report.

A significantly more, um, awkward exchange came as I stood half-naked in the gym following a workout.

It was one of those moments where you feel someone looking at you. I still had earbuds in, and each time I looked up I’d catch this guy shooting glances at me. After the second go-round, he grew enough courage to speak. It was either him or me. Because I wasn’t feeling this vibe. I agitatedly removed my earbuds.

“What do you do for your abs?” he asked.

Excuse me?

Just when I thought I might have to fight my way out of Planet Fitness, here I had an unforeseen fan. The last time a man complimented my abs I was in high school. It was the only other time. And it was my brother.

After my shock subsided, I told the man I only do cardio. He looked bewildered, pausing for a moment before continuing the conversation by asking if I biked. I told him no and that I use the elliptical.

But then I caught myself. I shared with the man that I drink a lot of water and that, mixed with my cardio, was my “trick.” He didn’t look convinced, and I realized I still wasn’t telling the whole truth. I added one last thing.

“Oh yeah,” I told him. “I’ve stopped drinking as much.”

The man looked crestfallen. He seemed ready to implement anything I suggested, but not that. We chatted about social norms surrounding drinking when it dawned on me I’d be better off not mentioning the importance of his diet. They’re all connected, and in that initially uncomfortable conversation that’s what clicked in my brain. I felt like I had aced a pop quiz.

It proved my plan is working. I’m changing for the better and it’s become noticeable. People around me have picked up on parts of my transformation before me. The irony is I never set out to lose weight. It wasn’t my priority. But routine has led to results.

As I wrote in my debut column detailing my mission with “Money Talks,” money is not what’s paramount. In my pursuit of financial independence and generational wealth, I have stumbled into a higher purpose of healthy living.

I’ve shared some of what I’ve done so far. I will be writing about many more. Individually, they might seem trivial. Collectively, they have structured my life, adding peace, purpose and clarity.

I make my bed each morning now, ensuring I start my day with a simple task I can complete. It entices me to complete another task and then another. I dutifully hit the gym for 45 minutes of cardio every Monday through Friday whether I feel like it or not. I used to let my $10 monthly membership go unused for months. But I’m done making boneheaded money moves, and I always feel better leaving the gym than I did when I walked in.

I supplement my gym time with my beloved walks. Alcohol no longer is a part of my daily lifestyle. I’ve also stopped eating out and started cooking, which I’ll write more about later this month. And I’ve gamified my monthly spending, competing against myself to see how much better I can be than the previous month.

I’ve reduced distractions and raised my discipline.

And now I need new jeans.

Pants and jeans that used to be snug now look like they belong to someone else. Suits I’ve owned a dozen years fit like I haven’t aged in a decade. It’s too bad they’re out of style. I’m already dreading paying for a wardrobe upgrade. My plan is to hold off until Black Friday and gobble up the best deals.

It’s not just the weight I’ve dropped. My relationships have undergone a makeover too. Some have fizzled. Others have fallen off. My new focus has created a chasm between me and several connections. It wasn’t my desire. The sudden shift came as a surprise and has squashed my already minuscule circle.

But I’m learning how clinging to the past can obstruct me from reaching my potential. By letting go of the old, I’m allowing space for the new. I’m at peace with the changes that are happening. I’ve become the best version of myself.

My mindset and behaviors have transformed. I’m starting to feel flexibility in my finances. And whether I want them to or not, others are seeing it in my physique.